a plastic face was biting me in my dream

kendal is a rare gem.

.

things have been kind of grim and purple lately.

there is no cause.

all i want to do is

dive into one of the giant snow drifts outside

and fall asleep until

it melts

that sounds quite emo

.

.

.

i have decided

that art can break my heart

in a way that no boy ever could.

my sandwich making skills are improving

i do love holly and bekah

so apparently some have said
that my noggin is not screwed on correctly.
i might have to agree with them
.
i wouldn't have it any other way
.
.
.
today i recieved a miniscule sailboat from a dear friend.
half an inch in width
on it were the words
"s.s. mecie"
i imagined myself to be teeny and
away,
sailing to a mysterious faraway beach.

my boots are still wet from last night's escapade

good and fun distracting night

rode on a magic carpet

to israel

last night with evan

i keep myself busy

today

there is a pile of sticks

outside my window

.

.

.

avoiding the encounter

with feelings

that whisper

.

i keep looking at the pile of sticks

I'm Back

havn't blogged in long time

no one will read this anymore so whatever

apple juice is liquid comfort

the covers are steel skin protection

i cannot believe i did what i did

sometimes it feels right and

sometimes i am weeping because

i miss him.

what's done is done though.

sincerity spewing from the windows

my dear friend, Katrina

and i waded in a sunflower field hip-high.

she has a beautiful brain and a musical laugh.

.

here i sit.

in a rolling chair that spins like the earth

watching my fingers dance across the keys.

a garden gnome is drawn on my left hand.

.

come, enter into the universe that resides inside my head.

let's be wonderfully vulnerable.

.

this morning i lay in my sheets sketching the view outside my window.

i decided to sketch the view from all the windows in the house.

sometimes i pretend like my bed is my spaceship

at night i am restless.

been having difficulties sleeping.

i lay there kindly asking my mind to slow down.

until i abandon the attempt and begin to paint.

.

my bedroom is a different planet.

more and more each day

as i paint peculiar ideas largely on my walls.

.

sometimes i find myself with strength

that i know does not belong to me

He provides.

perfectly mysterious.

trouble and relief.

^these were taken last summer, found.
i am home bound for a week.

foolish decisions.

i am relieved.

free

from telling lies.

this week i am going to attempt to become organized.

thankyou God, for adderall. . .

cheerful bit

nothing to say.
my fluffy sidekick has chewed 3 of my boots.
ugh.
besides that i am content.
ha.

i accept that i am not articulate.

long time since last post.
so i apologize to all 2 of you who read this. ha.
summer is a pitcher filling me with refreshing relaxation.
i desire to feel the earth beneath my bare feet. the naked shoes that i have built.
God works.
He shows up when least expected.
a boy with a beautiful heart has appeared and i am grateful.
right now i am content.

i am cross-legged.
i am a work in progress.

puddle of insanity goes unnoticed.

The above was for ap art.

summer time has granted me time
to create
and to drown in my fanciful imagination.

thank you, Lord Jesus for always residing
in my heart and mind.

today is the seventh day that illness has visited me.
i hope it has enjoyed its stay.
because i know i havn't.
it's time for you to go home, illness.

while my body is overcoming sickness,
i am thankful for the mind's ability to escape.

also.
i find myself comparing to other humans.
wishing that i was "more like her/him", "like them".
i should be striving to be more like HIM, the creator.

trying to build my summer feet.
gravel bites the soles
my heel warmly greets the soil

how i LOVE to let my mind dance and float

we lay on colorful quilts

shelly and i had childhood day/night
what a special person

lately
sheer bliss
i'm enjoying freedom
and a nice boy

sun looms
as i drag my picnic blanket
out of the shadow.

free

three footprints on blank concrete

sitting and savoring
lets drive
and listen to the wind greeting the interior
the speeding air hitting our cheeks

i'm a sponge.
taking in the moment.

i think i lost some me-ish-ness
lets retrace steps

microscopic blades of grass are sprouting from my fingertips

lets just dangle
a little more.
from a thread.
please.

it's nice to pick a team.

i think i need to talk more.
or at least write.
otherwise
im an unopened soda can.

trees make everything alright.

i'm in love...

...with His mysteries.
He is beauty.

God works in the most peculiar ways.

I'm ready.

signed and sealed and a stamp with a leaf.

Dear change,
you used to be
my enemy.
i used to loathe you
and talk about you
behind your back.
but now
i have learned
to embrace and
accept you and
welcome you.
feel free to visit me
when the time is right.
your new friend, mary elise

bittersweet chinese food run

all you can eat buffet

is lovely

but does not compare

to the family of choralaires this year.

the last day together

makes a loop and a scratch.

i won't forget.

let's be a little more fickle

please?
do we really change our minds that often?
annoyed
left hanging
but i'll get over it
eventually.
.
.
.
today, two loves and i went to my home
and sat on my bed to rest for a minute
3 hours later we woke up
sometimes an unexpected nap is so wonderful

the jackpot was hit on our trip to nowhere

my friend gretchen
and i discovered this weekend
an old building
with a large amount of "junk".
we agreed each object had its own story.
she helped me adopt an old turquoise and yellow door.
the paint is chipped.
it has personality.

ugh tastes like myself

i feel kinda like
a big bucket of ugh
i will take 5 minutes
to wallow
and then continue to go about
my afternoon.